I like in the Fellowship of the Rings where they are standing outside the big ass door with the riddle “Speak friend and enter” thing.
And then they’re like, what’s friend in elvish and Legolas just stands there and says nothing.
Frodo: *looks at Gandalf*
Everyone else: *looks at Legolas*
Legolas: [internally] fuck you, in Eregion they spoke a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT kind of elvish, I grew up with like ten different dialects of silvan, this word is pronounced differently in every one of them, this sindarin and my sindarin probably wouldn’t even be a little bit compatible, who fucking knows the door might want it in Quenya, you know what it’s probably in Khuzdul, that’s the kind of language you’d want a password to be in, the one nobody knows, fuck they’re all looking at me I don’t know this there are dozens of different languages spoken by elves you stupid fucks
Legolas: [externally] silence
Gandalf: “…Mellon”
Everyone: *thinks Legolas is stupid*
This is officially one of my favorite tumblr posts.
This is your periodic reminder to stop feeding, petting, grabbing, and otherwise harassing the wildlife. In addition to the danger you put yourself and other people in, when you habituate a wild animal to human food or contact you set them up for disaster. A fed animal is a dead animal.
Pretty much this. This situation happened because the sea lion was habituated to people and brave enough to start looking for food to steal (my best guess is the edge of the kid’s dress looked like the paper wrapping on a sandwich). Don’t fuck with the wildlife, because it fucks up the life of the wildlife.
shakespeare’s character descriptions/stage directions/contexts are so vague it makes me so happy. wanna make Laertes hamlet’s ex boyfriend? doesn’t say HE’S NOT. wanna make juliet a trans girl? WHERE IN THE SCIRPT DOES IT SAY SHE ISN’T??? fucking put King Lear in SPACE set that shit on the enterprise THERE ARE NO RULES IN SHAKESPEARE
The best part is that pretty much all of the fights are “they fight” with no mention of whether it’s with swords or throwing knives or kung-fu or if they just do the slappy-hands thing at each other.
A positive story that I really wanted to share with you all. It’s a bit long but worth it. TLDR at the end.
I have 2 rabbits. I was told they were both female. They are not. Now I have 11 baby rabbits. One of the babies is quite a bit smaller than the others and he had squirmed out of the nest so he was really cold and stiff when I checked on him this morning. I was running late for work so without thinking I grabbed him and tucked him inside my bra to try and warm him up and promptly forgot all about him.
I got to work and was talking to my manager when all of a sudden the rabbit woke up. He was hungry and made his displeasure known. My manager stopped mid sentence and said “Did your boobs just squeak?” And he just looked so alarmed it was hilarious. So I explained why I had a squeaky baby rabbit stuffed down my shirt and then he called all of my coworkers over to come see the baby and we all had a good laugh.
He said that I could keep the baby with me while I was on register so I bought some kitten formula and a dropper and fed it whenever it got noisy. (All friendly animals are allowed in the store so nobody minded. )
All day long customers would see my shirt randomly squirm and I’d show them the baby and they’d laugh. One guy saw me pat my boobs and say “Calm down I just fed you, you’re fine.” And he just looked so confused. 😂😂My manager said that if it survives it can be our unofficial store mascot and come to work with me everyday. It was pretty much my best shift ever.
TLDR: I freaked a bunch of people out with my boob rabbit. 🐰🐰
growing up in maine us writers were of course always comparing ourselves to stephen king. TURNS OUT HE’S FUCKING WRITER GEORG
“average writer writes 3 books a year" factoid actualy just statistical error. average person writes 1 book per year. Steven King, who lives in cave & writes over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
My favourite quote from Steven King was something like “I am a salami writer. I try to make good salami, but salami is salami.”
i just wanna give a special shoutout to pineapples for being literally one of the best fruits in the world they’re sweet and juicy and everything a fruit should be
And they dissolve your flesh if you have it on your skin for too long!
TARPON SPRINGS, Fla. - Polish artist and Tarpon Springs resident Piotr Janowski recently covered his home, including the concrete driveway and the surrounding palm trees, in sheets of aluminum foil.
The project, entitled “402 Ashland Ave”, is intended to make people think in uncommon ways about common goods.
For protection
against the aliens
okay but how did he get it so cleanly done
do you know how much chicken I could bake with this
today i got some columbian food in the back of a haunted mall how was everyone else’s day
ok i will tell the tale
so im taking this spanish class, spanish professor wanted us to go out to eat to practice. im all prepared, i punch in the address and drive 2 the place. turns out this place isnt really a restaurant so much as it is a small habitable zone at the back of a vast, empty mall
there was dead silence and darkness. 90% of the outlets were shut down and blocked off
it was 2 o’clock on a Saturday, but this mall was COMPLETELY barren. an air of powerful curses hung in the air. none of the escalators were working, i had to hike up one like stairs
of course once i got to the restaurant i had a nice time and some p good food and a guy with a saxophone serenaded us with covers of pop hits
my freinds, it was surreal
so my plans got really mixed up today and i decided to revisit the cursed mall while i was in the area! it seems things have gotten even stranger
for the most part, it is still the creepy empty mall it has always been. but this time even less stores were open, even the columbian restaurant was closed.
the food court, which was slightly open before, was utterly barren, and for some reason slightly sped-up mexican sounding music played over the completely empty venue
this was a particularly strange outlet, where instead of the remains of a store, there was a neatly set up classroom in the display window
“a writer’s character’s viewpoints don’t reflect the writer’s viewpoints!!!” actually, they do.
that doesnt mean having a, for instance, homophobic character means the author is homophobic. but how is the homophobia treated? is it criticized? is it excused, idealized? is it framed so that the homophobia is clearly wrong? does the inclusion of homophobia in the narrative serve a point?
writers, especially professional published writers, know that their writing has an impact, and the morals they put forward in their work reflect deeply on themselves. they know how they frame and present their work can completely change the result and effect it has.
so maybe the character’s viewpoints don’t say much about the writer, but how the writer presents this character and its viewpoints says a hell of a fuckin lot about the writer.
I'll mostly post funny stuff, and some of the amazing pictures from anime or shows I watch. Sometimes that means NSFW, so you have been warned.
